Saturday, January 02, 2010

Virginia Foxx Speaks Via Twitter

"Very distressed"
If not for this 140-character limit on Twitter updates, I would have said "I'm massively full of my adopted Baptist disgust, mixed with a healthy dose of true Catholic fascination with hell fire and the innovations of the Inquisition." But "very distressed" will have to do, unless you think it's a trifle limp-wristed. Maybe "sick on my stomach" would be better? Or "Puking up righteous bile"?

"about Obama"
There. I said his name. Are you satisfied? But notice the subtle dis. No first name. Ain't that cool? And I acknowledged no title for him. No "President." Hell no. Eff Obama.

"treating terrorist as criminal."
Damn this Twitter character limit! What I mean is, Obama (eff Obama) wants to put terrorist(s) behind iron bars instead of standing him (them) up against a wall and blowing their brains all over the stucco, or burning them in baths of phosphorus, or ... or ... see "the innovations of the Inquisition" above, or see for reference any bloody-minded echo of our heritage.

"Another example of Dems 'being soft on crime' "
Because it's not JUST that Obama (eff Obama) is black and Muslim and probably a foreigner with a faked Honolulu birth certificate. He's a Dem. Damn the Dems. Dem bones, Dem bones, Dem dry bones! Dem bones ain't gonna rise again! And thank Gawd for ancient slogans, like "soft on crime." That one comes from back when we used it ALWAYS to refer to black people, especially when they were agitating and marching in the streets for their so-called "rights." Animals! Our blessed forefathers knew how to deal, how to use the fire and the noose and the meat cleaver. Obama is a pussy. End of story.

"but now terrorists."
Got the "s" on there this time! America, are you paying attention? Booga, booga, booga ... TERRORISTS! The TERRORISTS are coming to get you! Hear that? It's TERRORISTS creeping up on you, and all Obama (eff Obama) and the effing Dems want to do is treat them as criminal. Not like us Republicans. We want to treat them the way you treated baby kittens when you were a poor sadistic kid with no social skills and what they called "lack of emotional connection" and with too much time on your hands. We want to open up a fountain of cruelty, those feelings you're sooo repressing right now. And we can do it, we believe, when we scream in your face, "TERRORISTS!"

Your believe-it-or-not reference to source.

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