Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Groundhog Day 2009

Congresswoman Virginia Foxx has issued a new pronouncement. We read it, so you don't have to (but if you must, there's the link).

WHAT SHE SAID
"It's stimulus time again."

WHAT SHE MEANT
It's not safe to sit down just any old where!

.........................................

WHAT SHE SAID
"Congress just passed an $825 billion so-called 'stimulus plan.' "

WHAT SHE MEANT
Dear Lord, pleasepleasepleaseplease don't let me utter the name "O-ba-ma."

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WHAT SHE SAID
"This is appalling."

WHAT SHE MEANT
Must. Make. Whatisname. Fail

...........................................

WHAT SHE SAID
"Haven't we heard this before?"

WHAT SHE MEANT
A-one, a-two, all together now:
"Who cares about the clouds when we're together?
Just sing a song and think 'bout sunny weather ...
Happy trails, toooo you! ..."

............................................

WHAT SHE SAID
"The megabank bailout plan that shoveled $700 billion in taxpayer money into banks with zero oversight and accountability was rushed through Congress in a panic."

WHAT SHE MEANT
George W. Bush should go to his room without supper. Forever.

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WHAT SHE SAID
"Folks, this is the definition of a pork fest."

WHAT SHE MEANT
But, ya know, I still get Christmas cards from Tom DeLay, bless his heart.

.............................................

WHAT SHE SAID
"There is a time and a place to discuss the merits of additional funding for federal programs."

WHAT SHE MEANT
Like, maybe, never, bee-yotches?

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