Rev. Dobson Lays Down the Law

"My conscience and my moral convictions," sez Mullah James Dobson, prevent me from voting for Rudy Giuliani. "I don't care how many Muslims he'd torture."

He didn't actually say that second sentence. But still.

Dobson called Giuliani an "unapologetic supporter of abortion on demand," when, actually, Giuliani apologized a lot and hedged and hemmed and ducked, until he began to look cowardly about it. Couldn't have that.

Meanwhile, the ineffable Newt Gingrich says he's embarrassed by the Republican field running for president and that he would personally NEVER take part in the quiz-show atmosphere of a presidential debate, like the one staged in South Carolina on Tuesday. He predicts September 30th as the projected date when he will throw aside his mantel of Senior Distinguished Philosopher and lumber into the contest himself, thus raising the intellectual level of political discourse to something he can bear to associate with.

Gosh. We're holding our breath and waiting for The Light.